Prologue
- Dirty Harriet
I
confess. I said it. When my husband raised his fists at me that
last time, I said: “Go ahead, make my day!”
He
obliged. So did I, putting a .44 Magnum bullet through his heart
and putting him out of my misery. Permanently.
Hey
– it was a clear case of self-defense, as attested to by the
five hundred witnesses at the scene, a wedding reception at the
Boca Raton Beach Club (BaR-B-Cue for short). Okay, so I ruined the
bride’s big day. Give me a break, will you? The SOB had it
coming, trust me.
Well,
the press had a field day, dubbing me “Dirty Harriet”
in honor of Clint Eastwood’s notorious Dirty Harry character.
That suits me fine – there are a lot of similarities between
old Harry and me. We both speak softly and carry a big gun.
My
real name is Harriet Horowitz. I’m a recovering Boca Babe.
No, those aren’t the opening lines of a Boca Babes Anonymous
meeting. There is no such beast, and even if there were, groups
aren’t my bag.
So
what’s to recover from, you ask? Let’s start with personal
appearance. The Boca Babe needs: a weekly manicure, biweekly pedicure,
twice-weekly blowout, monthly highlighting and razor-edge trimming,
lip and brow waxing, bikini waxing, a truckload of cosmetics to
keep Estée Lauder and Lancôme in business, twice-weekly
trips to the mall with the personal shopper, daily sessions with
the personal trainer. Had enough? We haven’t even started
on household maintenance.
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